I am openly a hopeless romantic and if you have followed my page for a while you will know this. I do believe in finding “the one”, chivalry and cute romantic gestures, just yet to find them. But in the age of swipe right apps, throw away life and fast pace living is Love now a game? To see how many mails or matches you can get in without creating a real connection, or how many knots on the bed post you can get without getting a STI. I hope not!
Don’t get me wrong I know people that have met through dating app’s and stood the test of time, but is that really all we have to look forward to? Being compared to 1000 of other girls or guys based on how photogenic you are!? Beauty is more than skin deep, but does anyone take the time to find this out anymore? What happened to bumping into someone in a pub, or sitting next to someone on a plane or even childhood sweethearts.
Has this way of dating made us so spoiled that we no longer want to settle? Have we reached an era where people will no longer be married for 50 plus years, is that something we are leaving behind?
At the start of the year in my first post back I mentioned how I was leaving a guy in the last decade and that was it, but I feel now is a good time to tell you why.
Disclaimer, as much as I am a hopeless romantic you only get one shot with me, I don’t believe in going backwards if it didn’t work the first time it’s not going to work the 3rd and the 65th time either.
Anyways so back to this guy. I meet him 3 years ago he was tall, charming and made me laugh. Like really laugh and anyone that can make you laugh needs to be kept around. So, we flirted for a bit and then went on some dates we got on well, but there was something not quite right. After about 6/7 months I found out I wasn’t the only one to be fair we hadn’t had that chat, but if am with someone for a few months it’s normally just them, but maybe that’s just me. He deiced to go with the other girl. Okay this is not shocking, a bit hurtful he waited 6/7 months to decide but maybe a blessing for me. It was how I found out was the worst. He just came into my place of work on a date with her and acted like it was normal, that he hadn’t just left my house that morning. Boy Byeee!
After this ended, I packed up, changed my number and went to South East Asia not just because of him but couldn’t of came at a better time. It was an amazing trip it lasted 6 months and I had such a great time and some not so great times but that’s travelling. Fast forward 2 years and this EX is back in my life, no not through choice we are working in the same place. He starts trying to talk to me telling me how he has changed, give the boy his due he tried hard for months and I don’t know why but I broke my own rule and caved in and went for a date with him.
Within a few weeks of date and meeting his mum, he started telling me how he wasn’t ready for anything and still wants to see what’s out there! OK I will just sit and home and wait till you have done a sweep and see if I can compete. Absolutely not, I will not be anyone second choice or back up plan and that why he stayed in 2019!
This story is not for sympathy, I like to call it character building dating guys like this have made me stronger and at the end of the day it’s not a loss. So just remember that you are worth of the whole someone not a half assed version. Those people that pick you, because see when they half assed people realised what they had they always come back, the trick don’t let them!
I am definitely not giving up on love, but are people? Are we giving up on love and throttling up on power?
Are we become more obsessed with success and power than love and happiness?
Why can’t we have both? Yes, I am successful and bring a lot to the table, but why can’t I share this with someone, who says you can’t have it all?
So, this year I am taking a time out, I am going to focus on myself and my brand. If a tall handsome strange ask me to go for coffee or if he can buy me a drink. Will I decline absolutely NOT, but I am not going to be swiping right and dropping messages to be ignored for days.
Just remember Valentine’s day is only one day. I think each and every one of you ready this are great 365 days a year just in case you’re like me and don’t have that someone special telling you that you are today.